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  • Writer's pictureAmba Brown


The first 20 lessons from my 20s

There is much to learn as we navigate our way into adulthood. This week, The Encouraging Doc. shares her first 20 lessons from her twenties.

1. Perspective is key to maintaining a sane life in the mind, but deliberate action creates opportunities.

2. Your life will never begin someday, your life is happening now. You can choose to live or barely exist. So be present in your life, make your own decisions, maximize your reasoning now.

3. If you want your life to be lit, light that shit up your self. Stop waiting on other people to come give you what you want.

Be bold enough to go request and take it for yourself.

Lessons from my twenties

4. You are nothing without God whether you believe it or not. This is a fact.

5. People connect with the authentic version of you though they will never tell you that. Be authentically perfectly yourself instead of seeking perfection.

6. Whenever God is doing something in your life, for you, to cause you to experience a breakthrough – you wouldn’t have to try so hard.

Take a breather. It’s called a blessing.

7. You will be happier when you’re mindful, intentional and living in the moment.

If you choose not to forget where you came from, that will keep you in proper perspective.

9. Fasting and prayer works! Some things would never change without you pushing a plate to the side.

10. Changing your mindset doesn’t work if you don’t put it into practice hourly. It is a continuous repetitive process.

11. Great changes begin with small deliberate and consistent actions. Just start somewhere.

12. Consistency, perseverance, self discipline and belief are the keys to producing effective and sustainable results.

13. Comparing yourself with other people leaves you more miserable than you were in your solo misery.

Why pile that on? It’s dumb.

14. “Ain’t nobody else’s life perfect”. Read the previous line in Ebonics. No one has a perfect life. Not even Beyonce.

If you choose to ignore your true self to fit in you are essentially betraying yourself.

15. Be mindful of the subconscious influences of your life! Especially the passive subtle ones i.e. narratives from family members, television and social media.

Don’t be a dummy that just takes in whatever information is presented to them. May I say – use your brain.

16. If a man/woman tells you he/she cannot love you and goes ahead to give you reasons, sister/brother, better believe them. It’s that simple. Why torment thyself?

17. Every physical experience has a spiritual meaning. Elevate your internal sense and seek it out.

18. Solitude is good for you. Change every loneliness into moments of internal and external solitude. Your mind is able to tap into a reserve of resources when you’re calm in body and in spirit.

19. True lové exists, don’t give up because it hasn’t happened … just yet. When the princess is ready the Prince will appear.


20. Maintaining a virtuous character will open up doors.


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